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Just Off-Camera

"They respect you if you write. The dumber the world gets, the more the words matter." -Dan Jenkins

Thursday, January 27, 2005

Ten Reasons To Root For The Eagles

10. Gillette Stadium only takes Visa; Lincoln Financial Field also takes MasterCard.
9. Tom Brady does commercials for The Gap; Donovan McNabb does commercials for Chunky Soup and NFL Equipment.
8. The Patriots' wide receivers are boring and interchangeable; the Eagles' wide receivers are entertaining, unpredictable, and hilarious.
7. Patriots' secondary features guys named Gay and Earthwind and a converted wide receiver; Eagles' secondary features three Pro Bowlers.
6. Tom Brady, despite being born under the luckiest star ever, is still suing GM for $2 million plus punitive damages. Donovan McNabb didn't even sue Rush Limbaugh or ESPN when he had the chance.
5. Mike Vrabel grabbed Ike Reese's nuts and squeezed during a scramble for a fumble last season. I'm sure there are Eagles who would do the same, but I know about this incident, and it ain't right.
4. Bill Belichick is the worst-dressed coach in football; Andy Reid only dresses like an idiot if Terrell Owens catches 15 touchdowns in a season.
3. Patriots fans prepare for games by humping trees in a bizarre forest ritual; Eagles fans prepare for games by converting old school buses into the tailgate vehicles of their dreams.
2. The Patriots' web site, after beating the Steelers in the AFC championship game, arrogantly proclaimed, "Yet another display of greatness by the best football team of the 21st century." The Eagles' site says, "One Team. One City. One Dream."
1. Patriots fans already got to celebrate two Super Bowl wins in the last three years, plus a Red Sox championship; Eagles fans haven't cheered an NFL champion in the last 44 years - or in the last 21 years in any sport.


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