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Just Off-Camera

"They respect you if you write. The dumber the world gets, the more the words matter." -Dan Jenkins


Saturday, April 10, 2004

Bonderman, Lunacy, Little Mac, Pat McGee, Etc.

Break up the Tigers!

There's plenty of room on the Tigers' bandwagon after last season's horrific performance, but now they're off to a 4-0 start (and if you count their 5-1 finish to last season, they've won nine of their last 10). How can you not root for these guys? They had a 21-game loser and a 19-game loser last season. To put that in perspective, nobody lost 20 games in the 22 seasons before that.

Speaking of which, I think I'm going to go out and get a Jeremy Bonderman jersey. He was the 19-game loser, but how can you not like a guy named Bonderman? When I hear his name, all I can think of is the commercial for Bomber Man years ago that went to the tune of the Spider-Man theme music.

"Bonder-man, Bonder-man, losing ballgames across the land..."

Of course, he's 1-0 this season. And I'm on the Tiger bandwagon.

***

Bonderman may be the must-have jersey for me (okay, not really, Jevon Kearse's #93 Eagles jersey is). But I found someone whose jersey needs to be sported by Murphy Lee, right freakin' now.

The St. Lunatics are all about two things (aside from bling, and hoes, and big spinning rims on their Escalades): St. Louis and sports. Remember Nelly's Air Force Ones video, featuring Torry Holt and Ozzie Smith, among others?

So the other day, this guy makes his debut for the Cardinals and hits a home run in his first major league at-bat. And his name is Hector Luna.

Seriously, if you're a St. Lunatic, how can you not get a Luna #7 Cardinals jersey? It literally has your name all over it.

***

I know it's a long season. I know the Phillies have 158 games to go. I know the defending World Series champions were miserable in May and changed managers. But I'm still unsettled by the Fightin's 1-3 start. Early-season jitters, I hope.

Besides, Pat Burrell looks better than he did last season and Billy Wagner was sick in his save opportunity. 159-3, baby!

***

Ever take apart a Big Mac? It's a disappointing experience. Being Jewish during Passover and all, I dissected one so I could eat it without the buns, and made a depressing discovery.

There isn't much substance to a Big Mac. It's probably 60 percent bread.

Let me tell you, eating a smaller-than-expected Big Mac with a fork sucks.

***

So tomorrow I'm going to be in Boston for a Pat McGee concert, and I figured I'd hit up the bar next door beforehand so I could watch Game 2 of the Flyers-Devils series. It's on ESPN2, so I know it'll be on TV. Unfortunately, I've been informed that because Pedro Martinez is making his first home start of the season, every television in a public place in Boston will likely be tuned to the Sox game. Which means I'll have to do some pleading to see Martin Brodeur get sunburned from the goal lamp tomorrow night.

***

And on the subject of Pat McGee Band, their new CD dropped on Tuesday, and if you look closely in the video of the CD extra, you can see me in the crowd. I'm sure I'm the only one who will notice, but it's pretty cool to me. If you have the CD, check out the shots of the crowd from the right side of the stage (or stage left, I guess). I'm the good-looking guy wearing a backwards dark blue hat with a red brim.

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